I love beginnings. I find them to be exhilarating and magical moments. And I am delighted to have arrived at another beginning with the next click of the Seasonal Wheel into Spring.
The changing of seasons are especially potent times for us to take stock of where we have been and where we are and CHOOSE where we will go/what we will create/who we will be.
Spring Equinox is a time of planting the seeds that will become the harvest of the fall. These soul seeds of growth are the opportunity to act as the Creatrix we were born to be and step into actively designing our lives.
A few years ago I sat with myself on the shores of the Irish Sea and really wrestled with the inquiry of whether I could ACTUALLY create and live a life I loved. In many ways it seemed ridiculous to even be considering. After all, I had a "good" life. And I did actually like parts of my life. I didn't however LOVE myself in that life and I definitely didn't feel like I CREATED IT. It felt like something that was happening to me and around me. I was full of suffering because I was so disempowered and disembodied. I was not sovereign. And I was not empowered. In fact, I had spent much of my life waiting for someone to show up and give me permission to have a dream and to really live.
Early in my dance career I had LONGED to find the choreographer for whom I would be the muse. I had great desire to inspire and help to create beautiful work with a master.
And really there is absolutely nothing wrong with this dream. It was quite beautiful in many ways.
But underneath it, energetically it was built upon the belief that to be ME I needed someone else better, more, and truly qualified to show up and breathe life into my LIFE. For some of us we are waiting for a career, a relationship, a child, praise from our parents, or validation from the system.
I was able to find a piece of empowerment that enabled me to be a strong collaborator with other choreographers but to also take the reigns of my creative life into my own hands and create my own work. But it took another decade before I was able to take that piece of empowerment off the dance floor and into my daily life.
So back to me at the Irish Sea…
As I sat there wrestling with the guilt over wanting more, the blocks to not knowing how to take authority and responsibility for myself, and wondering if there was even a possibility that life could be passionate, magical, and spacious…or I should just resign myself to not having what I want and life being full of suffering. The cool Irish breeze began to blow across my skin and dry the tears on my face. I didn't find the answer that day but because I was willing and brave enough to ask the question a process began to unfold.
Life began to shift, slowly at first. Almost like a tease-a whisper of look over here, the mention of a book, or a recurring dream of possibility. I began to pay more attention to what I wanted, loved, and needed. I began to stop focusing on meeting the demands of others. I stopped upholding the story of who I was based on the ideas of what others thought I should do and be. I found my own lane and learned to drive in it.
Why am I telling you this? Because those seeds of maybe, what if, and desire are what has led me right here…and enabled this work to be birthed. If I wasn't willing to dare we would not be connected through Radiant platform or the Heroine's Mystical Journey work. This work of empowerment that in less than a year has reached 100's of women and in the next year will touch 100's more. This isn't bragging. This is me reveling in the awe and mystery of process, the grace of choosing to listen to the Soul and not the world, and deep gratitude for all of us for hearing the call of LIFE and being brave enough to answer.
So I wonder dear Sister what call of creation or transformation has Life placed on your heart for this season? What seeds do you dare to plant? What dreams would you cultivate, tend, and grow? What would you create if you claimed your birthright of Radiance?
My mission is to lead a revolution of sacred rebels steeped in their divine power and shining so brightly into the world they cannot be ignored. So step from the apathy. Hang up the judgement. Put away the sabotage. And let go of the victim. It truly is our time to RISE.
Happy Equinox and Seed Planting!